creepy crawlies part 2

So I heard Benya scream "Snake!!"  After calming her histerical shrieking, I
went into the bathroom to investigate.  Actually i headed toward the
bathroom.  I didn't have to go in to see part of the snake's body from
behind the door.  He was huge!  about as big around as a CD!.....pringles
can! ... a golf ball... ok ok... just about as big around as a crayola
marker.

Quickly looking around for any weapon that I could use I finally snatched up
the most likely candidate - a small door mat - and proceded to do battle
with this unwelcome intruder.  With the small rug in hand, I slowly proceded
into the bathroom.  Still moving slowly, so as not to scare my visitor, I
moved a bucket over the drain so the snake couldn't escape.  Then i closed
the bathroom door, with me and the snake inside, and instructed benya to put
another rug under the door so the snake couldn't get out that way.  So now I
was trapped... along with the snake.. in a tiny bathroom.

By this time, mr. snakey had become suspicious, and had started slithering
along the wall.  WIth a quick florrish, I tossed the rug over him, and he
was caught!... actually, It wasn't quite that graceful.  I ended up chasing
him around the tiny bathroom several times until I finally got him captured
with my rug.  He was a vicious creature, and struck at me multipul
times...no... he was actually really docile, and just wanted to escape.  But
I did finally get the rug over him.

Now the next problem.  How to get ahold of his head without getting bitten,
because I didn't know if he was poisonous or not, and either way, I'd still
prefer to not get bitten by a snake.   I looked around the bathroom....
shampoo? no, squirting it in his eyes would just make him mad.  Plus, I
didn't want to hurt the poor little guy if I could avoid it.  towel? to big.
  Ah hah!  my washcloth!  Grabbing it off the rack, I lifted the rug just
enough to expose the middle of it's body.  now which way is the head?  
Finally figured out which direction to slide the washcloth, and got ahold of
his head with the washcloth acting as a berrier.  Pulled him out from under
the rug, and opened the door.  Benya, meanwhile, had been hopping up and
down outside the door with anticipation.  Once i had snakey caught,  I
finally said she could go call her friends.

Emerging from the bathroom, prize in hand, I headed outside to join benya,
eliyah and the quickly growing group of neighborhood children.  Snakey had
been very well behaved, so I decided that I could just hang onto his head
with my fingers and ditch the washcloth.  That worked fine for a few
minutes, but then he started trying to unhinge his jaw and get his mouth
around my finger, so I stuck the washcloth back around his neck and hung
onto that.  After all, he might be poisonous.

All the little kids stayed at a safe distance from the strange ferang
(foreigner) and her new pet snake, except for Eliyah.  When I first came, he
wouldn't come within 10 feet of a snake, but here he was, letting the tail
wrap around his arm, and encourageing his friends to touch the snake!!  I
was so proud of him!  I let the kids who wanted to, touch the snake, and
held it up so all the ladies looking out of their house could see.  By this
time, docile mr. snakey had become fed up with all this attention, and
started chewing  on the washcloth.  No problem, all snakes can bite.... at
least it was not problem until I noticed the FANGS!  oh no!  this snake
actually was poisonous!  At this point the reality of what i had just done
began to sink in, and the adreniline began to wear off, and I began to
shake.  I was holding a poisonous snake.... was I stupid or what??  But oh
well, I'd caught it, so I'd have to deal with it now.  So getting ahold of
myself, I expained to the watching people that this snake was poisonous and
we'd have to kill it.

I sent Benya into my house to get my leatherman knife, and we headed over to
the wilsons, with the train of kids, to exicute my new pet.  so sad...  
Pi Duang came out and agreed to translate for me.  Through her, I explained
that if the snake had not been poisonous, we wouldn't kill it, but since it
was, we would have to kill it since it was around people.   Now, I love
snakes, and hate to kill any, even poisonous ones, but it had to be done.  
(All you squeemish people should probably stop reading at this point...)  So
I decapitated snakey, with his fangs still sunk into my washcloth.  I then
had Eliyah hang onto the tail end of the still writhing body, and cut snakey
open down his stomach.

I then proceded to give the kids an impromptu A&P lesson.  The first thing I
pointed out to them was the still-beating heart.  Snakes hearts will usually
beat for about 30 mins after cutting their heads off, but I once had a
copperhead who's heart beat for over 3 hours! It really is amazing!  I also
pointed out the stomach, lungs, gallbladder, and intestines.  (grossed out
yet?)

Now that A&P was over, I moved on to skinning snakes 101.  I showed the kids
how if you get the skin pealed away from the neck, and by pulling gently,
it'll peal off like a banana.  I had Eliyah gently pull the skin and I hung
onto the body.  I then spread the skin out on a piece of cardboard to dry.

We then moved onto the head.  Carefully removing it from it's death bite on
the washcloth, and useing my knife, I lifted the fangs and explained that
this was the part you needed to avoid, and that even after it was dead, you
could still get venom in you if you pricked your finger on the fangs.

So now science lab was over.  I burried the head, threw the body away, stuck
the skin  somewhere safe to dry, and washed the blood off my knife, hands,
and the driveway.   Mr. snake had been taken care of.  Hopefully now, my
reputation will spread among the creepy crawlies, and they will stay out of
my drains and my bathrooms!  But just to let you know, this is one of those
"don't try this at home" things.  If you find a snake, just call me!   
but whatever you do, don't kill it unless you know for sure if it is
poisonous!  Snakes are awesome animals, so don't kill them! let them live
unless you absolutly have to kill them!  Until next time, God bless - Sha